what the hell!!

we are in the middle of the final exams and every evening there is a bloody power cut ... not that i am dying to study, but i have to do something about my grades. however much you work through the semester, these last few days will have to demand something extra..at times i really feel like running away to some wierd place and earn just enough to live by the day... this looks like too much to handle.
boring life,crappy subjects and a feeling of nothingness constantly haunts my peace, rather, whatever little bit of it is remaining. at times death seems to be the only way out, but even death requires a little bit of courage, definitely more than it takes to live like i do. a constant search to do something better and a constant question killing me "by parts". are we here to do what we are supposed to do..or are we to do what we want to do ?